Unorthodox advice for rescuing a marriage


The All-or-Nothing Marriage: How the Best Marriages Work. By Eli Finkel. Dutton; 352 pages; $28.

The State of Affairs: Rethinking Infidelity. By Esther Perel. Harper; 336 pages; $26.99. Yellow Kite; £14.99.

FOR Eli Finkel, the rise of speed dating was almost too good to be true. A psychologist at Northwestern University who studies relationships, he found that hooking up recording equipment at the tables where singles have brief chats with multiple prospective dates offered an extravaganza of data. The ability to follow up with participants for years afterwards helped make Mr Finkel one of the leading lights in the realm of relationship psychology.

Then, after his wife suffered two difficult pregnancies and post-partum depression, his own marriage, rewarding up until that point, was suddenly struggling for life. Love, intimacy and sex were all but gone. In his candid first book, “The All-or-Nothing Marriage”, Mr…Continue reading

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